Johnny Dzubak.

Please don’t cut off my Penis

I recently stumbled on an article about a woman who drugged her husband, tied him to their bed and cut off his member. I have been told many times by ex girlfriends that if I ever cheated on them that they would cut off my penis. I always laughed. I won’t be laughing anymore.

There is a lot of attention on battered women and it is awful that we find ourselves in abusive relationships, but there is plenty of evidence showing the abuse men take as well. Most of it goes unreported for fear of embarrassment. According to research, 835,000 instances get reported each year. There really isn’t a place men can go for help. Finding a support group is near impossible.

When it comes to the issue of domestic abuse, we tend to think about the women and never the men. At The Art of Charm we have seen our fair share of abused men.

If you grew up in abusive households, it can seem normal and it is easy to carry that abuse or a tolerance to take that abuse into our own adult relationships.

In writing this article, my main goal was to bring awareness. This is a problem and if you find yourself in this kind of relationship, the best answer is to leave. Most men and women will say that they have stayed in these relationships for the kids, but you have to understand that by doing that you are teaching the kids tolerance for this kind of behavior. This will find its way into their adult relationships either as the abuser or the ones being abused.

I believe that most men don’t even know what abuse is. Sure, we all know that being physically hit is abuse, but what about emotional abuse? I don’t think that men look at emotional abuse the way women do. As a guy, it would be hard for me to admit that my partner emotionally abuses me. I would feel that other people would see me as weak.

When two people live together and share their lives with each other for long periods of time, we learn the buttons to push to get a strong reaction and the intimacy we share to bring ourselves together is ultimately the same intimacy that can cause us to become violent with each other. Without respect we can grow to hate each other a little more each day to that point of no return.

This is a hot topic and I really don’t want to go into the specifics or finger point to who is responsible for what, but I do want to let men and women know that no abuse physical or emotional should be tolerated and therapy or early departure is the only answer. Fighting fire with fire can only exacerbate the issue further.